be like a psycho…

Sometimes I feel in my heart a piece of psycho..I feel like a man who is possessed or has something from the hell. It’s unpredictable. I can do things which don’t want and hate, I’m able to shout loudly and energetic, and sometimes I feel loneliness after these emotional incidents. Maybe I have to install a pad to kick it when I’m angry or being possessed that feelings… Don’t know. Sure…

Yearly financial goal

Yesterday I had a meeting with my bosses, a hard-talking meeting. I want to change my salary amount and before the meeting I sent an invitation with a short and clear agenda about my current situation and what I want to get from my company.

As I expected they have offered me a big financial carrot, it’s so naive approach…I accepted their offer because for now I don’t want to change the job position and from my point of view it’s a situation when I have to step out from comfort zone and try to achieve the most difficult and ambition goal in this year.

What the fuck? It’s so difficult goal. What I was thinking when I was accepting it! I know, totally know, this goal can ruin my family life and my hobbies completely because I will be focusing on the goal…

As fo me, I like it but I fear that if I will not get it It can influence on me dramatically, I mean, on my attitude to work, this job position…

i will use all my experience, all sales technologies and all my power to achieve the goal.

Now I lost two developers and It’s a bit risky for my plan and stability of getting a planned amount of money, weekly, monthly and yearly.

To the end of this week I must create a bunch of check lists and check point of the way to my goal.

Let’s play the game!…

English routine

Итак, как же сказать «да» и «нет» неформально — так, как говорят в общении с друзьями и знакомыми.

Начнём с приятного — с согласия. 

Sounds great! = Отличный план! 

Ok, agreed = Согласен

Okey-dokey! = Не вопрос!

Yeah, that works! = Ага, мне подходит / То, что надо

Just what the doctor ordered = То, что доктор прописал 

Totally! = Точняк!

Alrighty, then! = Ладненько!

Righto, chap* = Замечательно, приятель

*Чаще всего используется в британском английском

Отказывать часто бывает непросто. Поэтому на замену сухому no приходят более изящные способы сообщить, что вы не поддерживаете ту или иную идею.

I’m afraid I don’t agree = Боюсь, я не могу согласиться

I’m not so sure about that = Я в этом не уверен 

Not necessarily = Необязательно

I beg to differ = Позвольте [с вами] не согласиться

Pardon me, but… / Excuse me, but = Простите, но…

That’s not how I see it = Мне это представляется несколько иначе

Fat chance! = Да ни за что на свете!

It’s out of the question = Это даже не обсуждается

Under no circumstances! = Ни при каких обстоятельствах! 

She is…

Nowadays I know things are very busy, but before we are go through the topic, I’d like to introduce this song, just because she is…supergirl.

Perhaps it can be my first impression or not but, first of all, she is adorable and absolutely hard-working too, a bit independent and single-minded. Her sarcastic and none-emotional speech cast a spell you in a second.


On the other hand, she tends to do all man-type work herself like drilling walls or buying furniture for her flat.

I like autumn season

Sure, I like to see orange leaves and trees with old leaves. Every autumn morning when I go to the office I fell something like nostalgic. I’ve got some mixed feelings that winter is coming and soon I’ll see dirty and windy roads, streets and cold weather with wind and snow.

I like walking from nearest work metro to my office. It’s a nice place: narrow embenkment and a small tree park with tall trees ans lovely sand park paths. There are a lot of people with dogs: small and big, tall and fat, funny and angry dogs.

I like dogs, about 25 years ago I had a dog. It was a dog breed German shepherd. I loved him deeply. Iw was my friend, my lovely friend. I liked walking with him for hours. He was brave and strong dog with extremely funny character, especially with the wife.

Now, I absolutely discombobulate (my new old verb) because I wanna buy a dog for me and my family and that thoughts drills my mind daily. There are not two minds about that idea but that makes a lot of sense. What I really want is to be more athelitcs and powerfull. I belive the dog can help to imporve my physique body condition. That is easy to say but I have to discuss with all my family members about my crazy idea and the dog can destory all my ronovated rooms comlpletely. Hsi energy can be the reason of new bunch of conflicts and happiest stories, I hope…

On top of that autumn is the relaxing period of year seasons when you feel yourself absolutly relaxed and think of new year and other winter holidays. Great season, you know.

More than 20 years ago I’ve met my wife…03/11

My approach to keep to be addicted to guitar practice

You know motivation isn’t stable and you have to improve and rise daily because it’s your moving power or something like this.

The current week, every evening I was playing on my guitar intensivly, I mean, every day I was training patterns, spcial excersices and parts of solos for 1 hour or a bit longer. Excatly, before it I”ve added a notofication into my schedule to remind me about this routine.

What I’d like to say is at the end of the week my additcion is decrising and if you have the same situation you can watch some video with your favourites solos and songs. I hope I will help you as it helped me.

Additionally, I lined a simple scheme with week days to check them if I played good or bad. It also helps me keep it up. Totally.

Today I will schedule the 3 month education for guitar skill. I’ve bought 3 courses on 1Lad.ru. I will record my results every fucking month on youtube or another video hosting to insert into my blog.

After my 3 month education I will go to a record base and record a demo with me guitar techniques. I really hope, I’ll do it.

A motivation article which I’ve readed…Weight loosing…Yeah, again but it’s changing in my lifestyle

After reading inspiration article from Habr.com written by a IT engineer I’d like to say my motivation to loose my weight has grown extremely high, you know. During I was reading the article I was constantly comparing the author and me, I mean the motivation, experience, lifestyle etc, and what I really understood was his weight loosing approach is applyable for my character perfectly.

I don’t like training and fitness activities exclude roller skating and Volleyball gaming, and loosen my nervous system after cutting daily food or using some modern weight loosing system like 8-16 keto system and so on.


Frankly speaking I tried the keto system but It’s not worth to be used me, personally. I fault the eating regime and have added 3-4 kilos extra weight. wow…but I wanna loose fucking weight until new year weekend.

According to the article I have a chance to do it smoothly and calmly. Let’s give me an example what i wanna use in my life. Really, I have to change lifestyle, it’s not a short diet, it’s my life. I must change it completely.

Firstly, I have to escape high colorie food and meal like chocolate, spaghetti and potatoes.

Secondly, I’ve installed well-known Fat secret application to add notes about my meal habbit. Also, it helps me to controll all meal which I put in my mouth every day. I hope It would be perfect to rise my motivation and changing my life style.

Thirdly, I created a small XLS file to note my weight daily measuring. Soon I will create a page with in on my blog.

Forthly, I changed my dinner, I eat only vegetables. Note: yesterday was hard to kill hungerness in my brain but water decidede the problem with it.

Fifthly, I restarted my morning trainin, light morning training, 100-150 push-ups and a lot of simple excersises for 6-packs. That’s all.

After reading inspiration article from Habr.com by a IT engineer com I’d like to say my motivation to loose my weight has grown extremely high, you know. During I was reading the article I was constantly comparing the author and me, I mean the motivation, experience, lifestyle etc, and what I really understood was his weight loosing approach is applyable for my character perfectly.


I don’t like training and fitness activities exclude roller skating and Volleyball gaming, and loosen my nervous system after cutting daily food or using some modern weight loosing system like 8-16 keto system and so on.

Frankly speaking I tried the keto system but It’s not worth to be used me, personally. I fault the eating regime and have added 3-4 kilos extra weight. wow…but I wanna loose fucking weight until new year weekend.


According to the article I have a chance to do it smoothly and calmly. Let’s give me an example what i wanna use in my life. Really, I have to change lifestyle, it’s not a short diet, it’s my life. I must change it completely.

Firstly, I have to escape high colorie food and meal like chocolate, spaghetti and potatoes.

Secondly, I’ve installed well-known Fat secret application to add notes about my meal habbit. Also, it helps me to controll all meal which I put in my mouth every day. I hope It would be perfect to rise my motivation and changing my life style.

Thirdly, I created a small XLS file to note my weight daily measuring. Soon I will create a page with in on my blog.

Forthly, I changed my dinner, I eat only vegetables. Note: yesterday was hard to kill hungerness in my brain but water decidede the problem with it.

Fifthly, I restarted my morning trainin, light morning training, 100-150 push-ups and a lot of simple excersises for 6-packs. That’s all.

Chapter 4. Chronicles of office life. “I had a dream from Saturday to Sunday…”

“It’s highly likely that my mind leads some difficult game with me. I have not had any spectacular dreams for a long time but last Saturday I saw… It was one of the best night sleep which I’ve seen. After waking up I’ve totally understood that It was real. My mind created so spectacular night dream that I felt, I totally felt what I saw. It was so realistic. It still shocks me. I saw me office and my colleagues and I was discussing all those troubles which I had in this period of time, I mean, last week. I saw everything what there are, I mean in this office space. After it I sat, I mean, I was sleeping in my night sleep, I saw myself sitting on my usual workplace and I saw the screen with all my tasks which I left on my desktop screen in the office. I was discussing with my co-workers all humor things and so on. and surprisingly I felt the hug of my neck and small kiss from someone behind me. It was so a lovely and amazingly action. And I knew that It was she…I didn’t see her but I knew it. My fucking brain visialized her perfectly after 3-4 sec after her warm hugging and I felt her warm of hugging on my skin… It was her hugging like the same as last time I’d seen her. It was she behind me…Really”

What are you driving at?

Many-many years ago I was born in North small city in Ex-USSR. It was a beautiful time for my family. My father was a sailor… Those days It was an extremely popular profession as a job. My mother was a teacher who has been working for 50 years in this job position. That period of time I lived in dreams.

I listened to modern music such as Queen, Dio, Nirvana and other bands which I could find on cassettes. Modern people haven’t heard about cassettes completely but it was popular audio media…

Never mind.

Hence a question: Is it important which day you were born or not? The man has a fucking continuously queue of days and every fucking day you change. It is a long process without any stops and pauses. But Why?…Why do we celebrate our happy birthday only in someday?

43…

It seems…

It seems I have to do other things, I wanna change my character.

Recently I’ve decided to re-read my lovely and favourite book by M. Labkovsky. I hope you know this man who can destroy your mental state completely after reading his books. His psychological books are extremely interesting and helpful. They can shift your point of view orthodoxly.

I’ve got a lot of right things from his books and try to involve it into my daily routine. I’ve often started to say “NO” instead of “YES”, it helps me to spend my time for my important hobbies and things on my workplace.

It seems from another point of view that a lot of people can get out from me and I’m glad to add my new principles into my life. It seems I’ve started to change my life.

Why should I do what I don’t want to do? Why should I tell with someone who only spend my time and doesn’t add something positive in my life.

I wanna be happy…It seems I wanna clean my life and be positive. I wanna change and I’ll do it. I wanna meet people who like me and who add something special like happy, new activities, some new words and so on.

People create the hell in their heads themselves. Truly.

My new 6 principles are:

  1. I do only what I wanna do.
  2. I don’t do what I don’t want to do.
  3. I immediately say what I don’t like.
  4. I answer only when someone asks me something.
  5. I answer certainly only what you ask me.
  6. Finding out the relationship, talk only about yourself.

It’s all.